Neurodivergent Pep Talk: There’s Nothing Wrong with Being Different
The world needs many different types of people... because if we were all the same, how boring would that be? Neurodivergent therapist, Liz Zhou, shares affirmations for autistic, ADHD, and highly sensitive folks.
The below text originally appeared in Liz’s Neurodivergent Letters, an affirming weekly email series for highly sensitive, neurodivergent adults who feel burnt out from wearing masks all day & are re-learning who they really are.
There was a playground I liked to go to in my old neighborhood, specifically to swing on the swings, because it soothed and stimulated my senses in exactly the right way.
Once, a child came up to me on the swings, announced that he was 5 years old, and asked me: “Are you a kid or an adult?”
I answered jokingly, “I think I’m an adult. Why?”
The child responded, “Because you’re playing on the kids’ playground!”
“I love the swings — they’re adult-size too!” I said.
And we proceeded to have a lovely conversation about his favorite Pokémon, how old his sister was, and how so many people that he meets become his best friend.
I’m aware that as an adult, it might seem strange to be hanging out on a playground designed for kids. There are plenty of places where adults are “supposed” to hang out. And the child immediately clocked that I wasn’t “supposed” to be here.
(Not to mention, at a height of 5 ft 0 in / 1.52 m, I’m often mistaken for younger than my age.)
But our conversation also reminded me of this truth:
There’s nothing wrong with being different.
There’s nothing wrong with doing things outside of the box, in a non-ordinary way.
Because different doesn’t mean bad. It doesn’t mean wrong. It just means… coloring outside the lines. Taking a less-traveled path. Swinging on the swings because you feel like it. Doing what you want and need to do; instead of waiting for someone to give you permission (because it might never come).
And especially if you’re neurodivergent — whether self identified, formally diagnosed, or still figuring out who you are and what words you want to use to describe it — maybe different has always been the only way you knew.
Maybe you say exactly what you think, which makes people stop and stare, even though that wasn't the reaction you expected at all.
Maybe you’re the first person to leave a party (if you even show up at all). Or the opposite – you’re the last one dancing into the night and someone has to remind you to go to sleep.
Maybe you collect objects that are sacred to you, but that other people hardly understand.
Maybe you’ve always been “bad at small talk,” but you could talk for hours about the history of plant medicines.
Maybe you communicate better with animals than with other humans, and your cat/dog/lizard/turtle was your best friend growing up.
I wonder:
What makes you different?
How do you feel about being different?
How were you treated for being different?
Whatever comes up for you, I want you to know – there’s nothing wrong with being different.
The world needs many different types of people... because if we were all the same, how boring would that be? Our communities thrive when we are diverse. We are most deeply connected when we are welcoming of difference and the gifts that each of us has to offer.
So, this is an invitation to consider: how might your differences also be your gifts?
Keep being different, and keep being you.
Talk soon,
Liz
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About the Author
Liz Zhou (she/her) is a neurodivergent therapist, coach, and speaker. She helps highly sensitive, neurodivergent adults & couples heal their nervous systems and connect with their authentic selves, using brain-body modalities (Brainspotting, EMDR, IFS, psychedelic integration) that are quicker & more effective than traditional talk therapy. Liz offers Nervous System Healing Intensives online worldwide.
